So here, in no particular order, are my Top Ten Potential Theme Songs for The City of Harrisburg. ©

Tennessee Ernie Williams- Sixteen Tons
You load sixteen tons, what do you get
Another day older and deeper in debt
Saint Peter don’t you call me ’cause I can’t go
I owe my soul to the company store

Merle Haggard- Working Man Blues
Sometimes I think about leaving, do a little bummin around
I wanna throw my bills out the window catch a train to another town
But I go back working I gotta buy my kids a brand new pair of shoes
Yeah drink a little beer in a tavern,
Cry a little bit of these working man blues

Desmond Dekker – The Israelites
Get up in the morning, slaving for bread, sir,
so that every mouth can be fed.
Poor me, the Israelite. Aah.

Cast of Annie – It’s A Hard Knock For Us
It’s the hard-knock life for us
It’s the hard-knock life for us
No one cares for you a smidge
When your in an orphanage
It’s the hard-knock life
It’s the hard-knock life
It’s the hard-knock life!

Elvis Presley – In The Ghetto
Then one night in desperation
a young man breaks away
He buys a gun, steals a car,
tries to run, but he don’t get far
And his mama cries

As a crowd gathers ’round an angry young man
face down on the street with a gun in his hand
In the ghetto

Steve Miller Band- Take The Money and Run
Billy mack is a detective down in texas
You know he knows just exactly what the facts is
He aint gonna let those two escape justice
He makes his livin off of the peoples taxes

Bobbie sue, whoa, whoa, she slipped away
Billy joe caught up to her the very next day
They got the money, hey
You know they got away
They headed down south and they’re still running today

The Beatles- Taxman
(if you drive a car, car;) – I’ll tax the street;
(if you try to sit, sit;) – I’ll tax your seat;
(if you get too cold, cold;) – I’ll tax the heat;
(if you take a walk, walk;) – I’ll tax your feet.

Bruce Springsteen and The Sessions Band – Pay Me My Money Down
Oh pay me, oh pay me,
Pay me my money down,
Pay me or go to jail,
Pay me my money down

Rolling Stones – You Can’t Always Get What You Want –
And I went down to the demonstration
To get my fair share of abuse
Singing, “We’re gonna vent our frustration
If we don’t we’re gonna blow a 50-amp fuse”

P. Diddy, Puffy Puff Daddy – All About The Benjamins
You should do what we do, stack chips like *Hebrews*
Don’t let the melody intrigue you (uh-uh)
Cause I leave you, I’m only here
for that green paper which lead you

Got a report that the Mayor was drowning sorrows at McGraths Pub on Tuesday night. He was there with his usual band of suspects- Giorgione, Keller, Pickles, Lispi…and more.

Normally, the Mayor occupies a stool at the end of the bar. Apparently, his party was at a table near the entrance on Tuesday.

Earlier in the night, Bartender Chris had to kick out a drunk who was overly belligerent. Just absolutely wasted.

So shortly after the Mayor, Chief of Police, Captain of Police and a handful of other high-ranking city officials took their seats at a table, the belligerent drunk who was removed earlier re-entered the bar.

(And this is where it gets too crazy to believe)

The drunk guy approached the Mayor’s table and asked “Do any of you guys have a pipe? I got some weed”

!!!

A drunk dude.

Approached the Mayor and Chief of Police.

And asked them.

If they had a pipe so he could go smoke some WEED.

For a state with a pretty fair amount of colleges, we sure does has some stoopid people running around.

Only in Harrisburg…

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