I recently accepted a new contract with another venue. It’s much smaller and not nearly as centrally located as my primary venue, but a fun room nonetheless. It’s more of a “neighborhood bar” than anything, but they want to increase their bottom line by expanding their music programming for the weekends. Consequently, my workload has increased in the way of fielding calls, emails and calendar-crafting. Which has inspired today’s post.

Far too often, I get calls from bands who simply do not have their shit together. No website. No MySpace. An email address that’s difficult to spell or sound out (Me: “What’s your email address?” Them: “stixxvoxx69atAoldotcom”) Twitter? What the heck is that? Facebook? Nah, but we have six hundred followers on MySpace!

Sigh.

So here are a few more tips for young bands (or older ones who may have forgotten) who want to get into the calendars of music venues…but can’t figure out why they don’t get booked.

1. If you call (and you really shouldn’t) – know what you want to accomplish.
Do you have your thirty-second elevator pitch ready? Or will you fumble and make it up as you go along? Most every talent buyer or club booker I know hears from hundreds of bands all wishing to do the same thing: get booked and get paid. So when you call (again, you really shouldn’t unless you have a preexisting relationship with the booker) make sure you know what you want to say and get it done. There’s nothing worse than me taking a call from a number I don’t recognize and have to listen to a band pitch their act and then not even have a website to direct me to. Or a band who, until the phone call, I had never heard of ask me what I can do for them.

2. Don’t call. Email.
I realize this will contradict what I explained in Number One, but knowing that most people don’t listen, I’ll say this as well. Personally, I would much rather get an email (or two or three) from a band who wants to play with a simple “Hey! Really love your room. We’d love to play sometime. Here is a link to our site/MySpace/YouTube, etc.” This way, when I’m sitting here in my giant, climate controlled office in a skyrise high above the streets with my receptionist screening calls, sushi-delivery at the door and all the free time in the world, I can click your links and see if what you’re doing will make sense in our calendar.

3. Patronize the place you wish to play.
The first time The Hold Steady played Harrisburg in 07, following the announcement, I immediately got inundated with requests from bands who were hopeful to get the opening slot. And I had to laugh, because I couldn’t remember the last time I had seen any of the members of most of the bands who inquired at a show or an open mic. And THEN, a few of them had the audacity to tell their friends what an asshole I was for not booking them (I know this because it’s a small town and your friends aren’t as loyal as you think they are). Some of my favorite bands to work with are the ones to come to other bands shows, pay the cover on ticketed nights and generally participate. This is a participatory industry. You cannot expect to receive without giving back in some capacity.

4. Be persistent, but not annoying.
Send an email. If you don’t get a reply in a week or two, send another one. If you know the booker is going to be at a particular show, stop by the show and introduce yourself. Sometimes, the best way to “break through” the chatter is to go old-school on my ass. Come into the venue, have a beer with me and tell me in person why I should book you. And then thank the person for their time and go enjoy the show…maybe make note of what that band is doing and how you can relate that to what you’re wishing to accomplish.

5. When you DO get booked…
Sell that show as if your life depends on it. Think “If I don’t get 150 people out to this show, my life will END”. Well, maybe not THAT extreme…but you get the picture. Times are TOUGH. Budgets are being slashed like a going out of business sale and you need to make me (or any buyer) realize that we made the right decision when choosing to book you. There have been bands who have BEGGED me over the years to give them a shot. And when I finally gave in, they didn’t even send a poster to the room. Promote your show. Tell EVERYONE you know that you’re playing. But more importantly, do something to make them WANT to come see you. Be different. Unique. Use that noggin to create a compelling reason for your friends to take time out of their schedule to come to a bar and spend their hard earned money supporting your band.

Or, just stay in your garage practicing those Nickelback covers and playing backyard barbecues in the summer.