Right and Wrong

Seven years.

My grandmother says that things go in seven year cycles.

Seven shit years followed by seven years of triumph.

Seven year chapters of relationships.

You see, my grandmother was married for over fifty years. She’s clearly experienced enough to dispel this wisdom.

Me, however, I’m still in those seven year chapters.

Sold speakers for seven years. Followed by seven years in Harrisburg.

Seven, karmically retributive years.

But in our cycles of life, there are things which we pick up along the way…some from mistakes we’ve made, some from lessons we’ve learned from peers or elders and others yet are life experiences which we take things away from to keep in our moral-pocket the rest of our lives.

Here’s a list. Nothing scientific, but just a handful of items I try to remind myself of daily (or as necessary) to get me through the toughest of times. Feel free to add to this little project..as I’m sure we can share a thing or two with one another.

1. It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.

In business. At a restaurant. With your mother on the phone. To your son or daughter. I’ve found that you can get virtually any message across to a listener if you simply say it kindly.

I’ve seen this rule be ignored by countless people I’ve encountered. Particularly bosses or figures of authority. “Ask nicely” I was always taught. No need to be a dick, right?

2. Attitude is everything.

Great attitude = great results.

Bad attitude = bad results.

I’ve seen this in action and have caught myself when I’ve just generally got a bad attitude about a situation. Life’s short. No need to sweat the small stuff, right?

3. Regardless of what your mother said, a moderate about of sex, drugs and rock and roll are just as essential as your daily multivitamin.

Maybe more “sex” and “rock and roll” than “drugs” (depending on your definition). And perhaps it’s what I do for a living..but I can’t go a week without at least a little of each of those three items.

4. Be nice to girls.

I’m always astounded when I read in the paper about someone physically hurting a woman. Maybe it’s just how I was raised, but it just seems like there are things that one wouldn’t need to be taught. If she’s really that tough to deal with, walk away. But always take the high road.

And on that note..

5. Bros before Hoes.

Women come and go. But a bro is always supposed to be there. So fellas- ya’ll should know that if your best bud breaks up with his girl, she is, forever, off limits. And if you break that rule, you’re a douchebag and a cheat for life. It’s just another one of those things that one would think that dudes would respect and unconditionally know…but unfortunately, that is not the case.

6. Hold the door for the person behind you.

There’s a rule to this though…I generally use the twenty-foot-rule. If I’m entering a building and there’s someone behind me who is walking at a moderate pace, I’ll hold the door for them. It’s just courteous. Then again, if they’re lollygagging along, all bets are off.

7. Believe half of what you see and none of what you hear.

If I were to discount everyone in Harrisburg prior to meeting them myself based on the opinions of others, I’d likely not have any friends. People make bad decisions from time to time and leave a bad taste in the mouths of some. Occasionally, it happens. But I prefer to give people the benefit of the doubt until they wrong me personally.

That said…

8. Screw me once, shame on you. Screw me twice…shame on me.

Once a thief always a thief? Perhaps. But generally, the ‘one strike’ rule tends to hold up.

That’s it. It’s by no means a complete list. And I’m sure I’ll add to it.

What are some of your rules to live by?


  1. BPSmith says:

    Due South.

    Remember that show from the mid-90′s? Everyone and their pretext about other countries and cultures, blah, blah, blah.

    Your post reminds me of how courteous RCMP Fraser is/was.

    And yes, it is all in how you say it. But sometimes, just sometimes, tact is for people who aren’t witty enough to be sarcastic.

    But I always, ALWAYS hold the door for people and I am ALWAYS nice to cashiers, even if the are bitchy, because I have been there and done that.

    8 – I learned the hard wat over the past 2 decades of how you can never really know someone. So, I very rarely let anyone in, which is odd since I seem to like you. Even though you never said if you got Dr. Horrible or not.

    My only addition would be that I, being prosaic, trust no one. Burnt too many times, it is they who must earn the trust. I can not just give it away freely anymore. I will never understand why everyone, big and small, always feel the need to have an agenda.

    (The walking contradiction)

  2. [...] gotten picked on before for using the word“chivalry” to describe how one should act in society. So apparently since I believe in some useless form of [...]

  3. BPSmith says:

    PS ~ Not to blog stalk or to pimp my shit but I linked this current post to mine fore it had a similar theme.

    Sort of.

    so, the 5 readers I have will come and read your stuff.

    Thank me later.

  4. BPSmith says:

    I am NOT stalking but since I “linked” to your blog it automatically did that thing up there.


  5. veronica Van Jura says:

    You sound just like Mom in about half of these .

    My addition would be :

    Get your priorities strait as soon as you get out of bed in the morning .

    You can’t make everyone happy,but you can try,and by trying to make the ones closet to you happy,you will find your self being happy without having to try .

    see you tommorow !oh..waiit..